You Can Choose Your Friends, but Your Family. . .

You Can Choose Your Friends, but Your Family. . .

A Page of Legends from NDSU

A Good Investment in Life Insurance

My story is more of a ghost story than a legend. My aunt was married to a man about 20 years ago. One night she woke up and found that he was awake and very troubled. He said the ghost of his dead mother was standing at the end of their bed and told him that he would be joining her soon. She also told him to take care of his family. They didn't have much money, but after that he bought some life insurance. 3 months later he died in a car accident. My aunt strongly believes it is true, and her certainty causes me to believe it, too.

Death Leap

This story is 100% true, but it's nonetheless legendary.

My dad and brother Todd were vaccinating cattle a few years ago when they noticed a neighbor's cow in amongst our herd. They decided to put it in a stall in our barn until they'd finished vaccinating. All went well until they saw the supposedly penned-up cow staring down at them through the hay door on the second level. Apparently it had climbed up the steps!

Todd went to get the cow, but to no avail. As soon as it heard Todd coming up the steps, it attempted to leap from the door. Its back legs got caught, but it somehow maneuvered its way out, falling head first onto the well beneath the door. As Dad ran to see if the cow was okay, it got up and hustled away as if nothing had happened.

(Where's America's Funniest Home Videos when you need them?)

Cool Whip

Three years ago I went to Thanksgiving dinner at my grandma's house. We had the usual meal of turkey and mashed potatoes. Finally it came time for dessert. My grandma had prepared three kinds of pie. I chose chocolate. This would be one of the grandest mistakes of my life. She then asked who would like whip cream. With the thought of whipped cream on top of my glorious chocolate pie I was happier then Michael Jackson at a day care center.

My grandmother returned from the fridge holding a massive tub of cool whip. Upon opening the cool whip, the top is covered with mold. I swear the whole top was green. I was thinking fine, I'll enjoy my pie as is. But then my Grandma grabs the spoon sitting next to me and stirs up the cool whip so the mold is no longer visible. I sit in shock as she whips the biggest dollop of cool whip I had ever seen in my life onto my plate. This is more cool whip on that pie than Heidi Fleiss and Charlie Sheen have ever used COMBINED!

Anyway she threw the cool whip on a couple of other people's pies, too, and all of us were too shy (or stupid) to say something. Then my father tells me I better eat it as to not disappoint my grandmother. So I ate the moldy cool-whip laden pie. I was proud of my intestinal fortitude of keeping it down. My brother and mother did not fare so well.

Author's note: My grandma still has the same tub of cool whip in her fridge and a bottle of BBQ sauce that expired before I was born.